When I was 24, fresh out of my master’s program (I had gone straight from undergraduate into my master’s program), I worked for a small financial consulting company. They worked with non-profit organizations and charities to manage their planned giving programs. I worked with their clients to write and edit newsletters that went out to their donors. Some of my clients were: St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, The Jane Goodall Institute, Centenery College, and National Geographic to name a few.
I started in July 2007.
By the end of the year, the small staff was smaller.
Towards the end of the year, there was talk of slower sales and profits. This was the time of the “economic slowdown,” a recession that no one was willing to name just yet.
Overall, I liked this job. I worked with cool people. I learned a lot about planned giving, annuities, and wills. I learned about population characteristics and trends that affected charitable giving and how to write and market specifically to these populations.
However, I had a feeling that I had not come to stay on this job for long.
My first clue that my time there would be much shorter than I thought came when the CEO commented on a newsletter. I worked on a team with 4 other editors. He personally called each one of them and left me out. I thought this odd, but at 24, I had no idea why.
Early morning on December 31, 2007, I got a call from HR (really, HR was one person) who asked if I could stop by her office that afternoon.
Sure, I responded. We were actually kinda friends. We knew a lot of the same people (that’s kinda how I got hired) so I thought she just wanted to catch up.
About 3pm, I walked downstairs to HR’s office. The CEO was speaking to our HR person so I waved and waited outside the door.
The CEO called me in.
A meeting with both of them? I wasn’t sure what to think of this, but it was a small company, we were all cool, so, okay, let’s chat.
No sooner had a sat in a chair than I heard the 7 words no one wants to hear:
“We’re gonna have to let you go.”
I felt so heavy I thought I was going to fall through the floor.
The CEO kept talking. I caught bits and pieces. The CEO handed me an envelope with COBRA information in it.
“Do you need help with your stuff?”
“No, I got it.” I managed to stammer out.
I somehow managed to lift myself out of that seat and make my way back upstairs to my cubicle. It was after 5pm (I had been down there that long?) so lights were out and everyone was gone except for one graphic designer.
I grabbed the box I had carried my things in with. Like I said, I didn’t think I would be there long so I kept it.
I knew I had made some mistakes on the job. I thought I could recover from them. Apparently, I could not.
I’m a pretty intuitive person, sometimes a little too intuitive for my own good.
I struggled with the door so the graphic designer helped me out. That’s all the help I got.
New Year's Eve 2007, I went home with my life in a box.
Luckily, I was living at home with my parents and I was single. Well, I could throw away all those apartment magazines now. I wasn’t going anywhere.
New Year’s Day passed and on January 2, my phone started ringing starting around 8:05am. I knew it was my coworkers calling, wondering where I am, if I was okay. I’m not one to miss work a lot so they knew something must be wrong. The phone stopped ringing for about 45 minutes and then around 9am, a fresh round of calls. I knew what that was too. They just found out I got laid off and were calling to offer condolences. While I appreciated the sentiment, hearing an avalanche of “I’m sorry’s” would be a downer. I listened to their voicemails later.
Like I said, sometimes I’m a little too intuitive.
I found out later from the other editors, that the CEO called a big meeting on January 2. And that they repeatedly told the CEO that they couldn’t have a big meeting “because Jennifer isn’t here.”
That’s when they were told about my lay off.
By the end of 2008, the team of editors would all be laid off.
I share this story to tell you that I know what it’s like to be laid off. Although there were parts of the job that I liked, most of it I didn’t. I also know what it’s like to be laid off from a job you don’t even like. And I know what it’s like to feel really conflicted about it.
Lay offs suck, but in the end, it gave me the time to think about what I really wanted to do. It gave me the courage to apply to the PhD program I had been thinking about. I’m glad it happened because I don’t think I would have left that job on my own.
I hope if you have been laid off, you will take this opportunity to pause and listen for redirection.
Comments